an oldie but worth another read and giggle

I came out of the Takeaway with a meat & potato pie, large chips, mushy peas & a jumbo sausage.
A poor homeless man, sitting there, said,  "I haven't eaten for two  days."
I  told him,  "I wish I had your will power!"A fat girl took a while to serve me in McDonald's at lunch time today.
She said,  "Sorry  about the wait."
I said,  "Don't worry dear.  You might lose it eventually."

I walked past a black kid sitting at a bus stop, as I went into the  Bank.
When  I came out, he looked at me and said, "Any  change?"
I said  "Nope, you're still black."

Snow in the forecast!
The TV weather girl said, she was expecting 8 inches tonight.
I thought to myself,  "Fat chance with a face like that!"An  Irish boy stands crying at the side of the road.
A man asks him,  "What's wrong?"
The boy says,  "Me Ma is dead".
"Oh bejaysus,"  the man says,  "Do you want me to call Father O'Riley for you?"
The boy replies,  "No tanks, mister... Sex is the last ting on my mind at the moment.."

Thanks Norman