Total Pageviews

Sunday, September 28, 2014

Tombstone Humor

Harry Edsel Smith of  Albany , New York :
Born 1903--Died 1942.
Looked up the elevator shaft to see if the
car was on the way down. It was.

=============================

In a Thurmont, Maryland , cemetery:
Here lies an Atheist, all  dressed up
and  no  place to go.

=============================

On the grave of Ezekial Aikle in
East Dalhousie Cemetery , Nova  Scotia :

Here lies Ezekial Aikle, Age 102.
Only the good die young.

=============================

In a London , England cemetery: 
Here lies Ann Mann, who lived an old maid
but died an old Mann. Dec. 8, 1767

=============================

In a Ribbesford, England , cemetery:
Anna  Wallace
The children of  Israel wanted  bread,
and  the Lord sent them manna.
Clark  Wallace  wanted a wife,
and the Devil sent him Anna.

===============================

In a Ruidoso,  New Mexico ,  cemetery:
Here lies Johnny Yeast.
Pardon him  for not rising.

===============================

In a Uniontown,  Pennsylvania ,  cemetery:
Here lies the body of  Jonathan Blake,
stepped on the gas instead of the brake.

==============================

In a Silver City , Nevada , cemetery:
Here lays The Kid, we planted him raw.
He was quick on the trigger, but slow on the draw.

================================

A lawyer's epitaph in England :
Sir John Strange.
Here lies an honest lawyer,  and that is Strange.

=================================

John Penny's epitaph in  the Wimborne,
England , cemetery:

Reader, if cash thou art in want of any,
dig 6 feet deep and thou wilt find a Penny.

==================================

In a cemetery in  Hartscombe , England :
On the 22nd of June, Jonathan Fiddle went  out of tune.

==================================

Anna Hopewell's grave in Enosburg Falls ,
Vermont :

Here lies the body of our Anna,
done to death by a banana.
It wasn't the fruit that laid her low,
but the skin of the thing that made her go.

==================================

On a grave from the 1880s  in Nantucket ,
Massachusetts :

Under the sod and under the trees,
Lies the body of Jonathan Pease.
He is not here, there's only the pod,
Pease shelled out and went to God.

==================================

In a cemetery in England :
Remember man, as you walk by,
as you are now, so once was I.
As I am now, so shall you be,
remember this and follow me.

 
To which someone replied  by writing on the  tombstone: 
                                     "To follow you I'll not consent,
                                      until I know which way you went."
 
Thanks Heidi

No comments:

Post a Comment