Tombstone Humor

Harry Edsel Smith of  Albany , New York : Born 1903--Died 1942. Looked up the elevator shaft to see if the car was on the way down. It was. ============================= In a Thurmont, Maryland , cemetery: Here lies an Atheist, all  dressed up and  no  place to go. ============================= On the grave of Ezekial Aikle in East Dalhousie Cemetery , Nova  Scotia : Here lies Ezekial Aikle, Age 102. Only the good die young. ============================= In a London , England cemetery:  Here lies Ann Mann, who lived an old maid but died an old Mann. Dec. 8, 1767 ============================= In a Ribbesford, England , cemetery: Anna  Wallace The children of  Israel wanted  bread, and  the Lord sent them manna. Clark  Wallace  wanted a wife, and the Devil sent him Anna. =============================== In a Ruidoso,  New Mexico ,  cemetery: Here lies Johnny Yeast. Pardon him  for not rising. =============================== In a Uniontown,  Pennsylvania ,  cemetery: Here lies the body of  Jonathan Blake, stepped on the gas instead of the brake. ============================== In a Silver City , Nevada , cemetery: Here lays The Kid, we planted him raw. He was quick on the trigger, but slow on the draw. ================================ A lawyer's epitaph in England : Sir John Strange. Here lies an honest lawyer,  and that is Strange. ================================= John Penny's epitaph in  the Wimborne, England , cemetery: Reader, if cash thou art in want of any, dig 6 feet deep and thou wilt find a Penny. ================================== In a cemetery in  Hartscombe , England : On the 22nd of June, Jonathan Fiddle went  out of tune. ================================== Anna Hopewell's grave in Enosburg Falls , Vermont : Here lies the body of our Anna, done to death by a banana. It wasn't the fruit that laid her low, but the skin of the thing that made her go. ================================== On a grave from the 1880s  in Nantucket , Massachusetts : Under the sod and under the trees, Lies the body of Jonathan Pease. He is not here, there's only the pod, Pease shelled out and went to God. ================================== In a cemetery in England : Remember man, as you walk by, as you are now, so once was I. As I am now, so shall you be, remember this and follow me.

To which someone replied  by writing on the  tombstone:                                       "To follow you I'll not consent,                                       until I know which way you went."   Thanks Heidi