Why Marry

You have two choices in life:
You can stay single and be miserable,
Or get married and wish you were dead.
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At a cocktail party, one woman said to another,
"Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?"
"Yes, I am. I married the wrong man."
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A lady inserted an ad in the classifieds:
"Husband Wanted".
Next day she received a hundred letters.
They all said the same thing:
"You can have mine."
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When a woman steals your husband,
There is no better revenge than to let her keep him.
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A woman is incomplete until she is married. Then she is finished.
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A little boy asked his father,
"Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?"
Father replied, "I don't know son, I'm still paying."
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A young son asked,
"Is it true Dad, that in some parts of Africa
A man doesn't know his wife until he marries her?"
Dad replied, "That happens in every country, son."
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Then there was a woman who said,
"I never knew what real happiness was until I got married,
And by then, it was too late."
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Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.
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If you want your spouse to listen and
Pay strict attention to every word you say -
Talk in your sleep.
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Just think, if it weren't for marriage,
Men would go through life
Thinking they had no faults at all.
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First guy says, "My wife's an angel!"
Second guy remarks, "You're lucky, mine's still alive."
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A Woman's Prayer
"Dear Lord,
I pray for wisdom to understand a man; to love and to forgive him;
and for patience, for his moods.  Because Lord,
If I pray for strength I'll just beat him to death!!"
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Thanks Norman