Politically Correct

*Due to the climate of political correctness now pervading America, Kentuckians, Tennesseans and West Virginians

will no longer be referred to as*  *'HILLBILLIES.'*
*You must now refer to them as*
*APPALACHIAN-AMERICANS.*

*HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT **WOMEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:*

*1. She is not a 'BABE' or a 'CHICK' - She is a*
*BREASTED AMERICAN. '*

*2. She is not 'EASY' - She is*
*'HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE.'*

*3. She is not a 'DUMB BLONDE' - She is a*
*'LIGHT-HAIRED DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY.'*

*4. She has not 'BEEN AROUND' - She is a*
*'PREVIOUSLY-ENJOYED COMPANION.'*

*5. She does not 'NAG' you - She becomes*
*VERBALLY REPETITIVE.'*

*6. She is not a 'TWO-BIT HOOKER' - She is a*
*LOW COST PROVIDER.'*

*HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT MEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:*

*1. He does not have a 'BEER GUT' - He has developed a*
*'LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY.'*

*2. He is not a 'BAD DANCER' - He is*
*OVERLY CAUCASIAN.'*

*3.. He does not 'GET LOST ALL THE TIME' – He*
*INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS.'*

*4. He is not 'BALDING' - He is in*
*'FOLLICLE REGRESSION.'*

*5. He does not act like a 'TOTAL ASS' - He develops a case of*
*RECTAL-CRANIAL INVERSION.'*

*(Loved this one!)*

*6. It's not his 'CRACK' you see hanging out of his pants - It's*
*'TROUSER CLEAVAGE.'*

Thanks Ivan