I can almost feel myself losing weight just by forwarding this to you! You'll understand at the end.
I've seen two shows lately that went on and on about how mid-life is a great time for women.
I've seen two shows lately that went on and on about how mid-life is a great time for women.
Just last week, Oprah had a whole show on how great menopause will be. Puhleeeeeeeze! I've had a few thoughts of my own and would like to share them with you. Whether you are pushing 40, 50, 60 (or maybe even just pushing your luck), you'll probably relate.
Midlife is when the growth of hair on our legs slows down. This gives us plenty of time to care for our newly acquired moustache.
In midlife, we women no longer have upper arms, we have wingspans. We are no longer women in sleeveless shirts, we are flying squirrels in drag.
Midlife is when you can stand naked in front of a mirror and you can see your rear without turning around.
Midlife is when you go for a mammogram and you realize that this is the only time someone will ask you to appear topless.
Midlife is when the growth of hair on our legs slows down. This gives us plenty of time to care for our newly acquired moustache.
In midlife, we women no longer have upper arms, we have wingspans. We are no longer women in sleeveless shirts, we are flying squirrels in drag.
Midlife is when you can stand naked in front of a mirror and you can see your rear without turning around.
Midlife is when you go for a mammogram and you realize that this is the only time someone will ask you to appear topless.
Midlife is when you want to grab every firm young lovely in a tube top and scream, "Listen, honey, the Roman Empire fell and those will too."
Midlife brings wisdom to know that life throws us curves and we're sitting on our biggest ones.
Midlife is when you look at your know-it-all, beeper-wearing teenager and think, 'For this I have stretch marks?'
In midlife your memory starts to go. In fact, the only thing we can retain is water.
Midlife means that you become more reflective. You start pondering the 'big' questions. What is life? Why am I here? How much Healthy Choice ice cream can I eat before it's no longer a healthy choice?
Mid-life also brings with it an appreciation for what is important. We realize that breasts sag, hips expand and chins double, but our loved ones make the journey worthwhile. Would any of you trade the knowledge that you have now for the body you had way back when?
Midlife is when you look at your know-it-all, beeper-wearing teenager and think, 'For this I have stretch marks?'
In midlife your memory starts to go. In fact, the only thing we can retain is water.
Midlife means that you become more reflective. You start pondering the 'big' questions. What is life? Why am I here? How much Healthy Choice ice cream can I eat before it's no longer a healthy choice?
Mid-life also brings with it an appreciation for what is important. We realize that breasts sag, hips expand and chins double, but our loved ones make the journey worthwhile. Would any of you trade the knowledge that you have now for the body you had way back when?
Maybe our bodies simply have to expand to hold all the wisdom and love we've acquired. That's my philosophy and I'm sticking to it!
No comments:
Post a Comment