A dog called Sex

Everybody I know who has a dog usually calls him "Rover" or "Spot". I call mine Sex. Now, Sex has been very embarrassing to me. \

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> >> When I went to the City Hall to renew the dog's license, I told the clerk that I would like a license for Sex.
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> >> He said, "I would like to have one too!"
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> >> Then I said, "But she is a dog!"
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> >> He said he didn't care what she looked like.
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> >> I said, "You don't understand. ... I have had Sex since I was nine years old."
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> >> He replied, "You must have been quite a strong boy."
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> >> When I decided to get married, I told the minister that I would like to have Sex at the wedding.
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> >> He told me to wait until after the wedding was over.
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> >> I said, "But Sex has played a big part in my life and my whole world revolves around Sex."
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> >> He said he didn't want to hear about my personal life and would not marry us in his church.
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> >> I told him everyone would enjoy having Sex at the wedding.
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> >> The next day we were married at the Justice of the Peace. My family was barred from the church from then on.
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> >> When my wife and I went on our honeymoon, I took the dog with me.
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> >> When we checked into the motel, I told the clerk that I wanted a room for me and my wife and a special room for Sex.
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> >> He said that every room in the motel is a place for sex.
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> >> I said, "You don't understand. ... Sex keeps me awake at night."
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> >> The clerk said, "Me too!"
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> >> One day I entered Sex in a contest. But before the competition began, the dog ran away.
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> >> Another contestant asked me why I was just looking around.
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> >> I told him that I was going to have Sex in the contest.
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> >> He said that I should have sold my own tickets.
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> >> "You don't understand," I said, "I hoped to have Sex on TV."
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> >> He called me a show off.
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> >> When my wife and I separated, we went to court to fight for custody of the dog.
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> >> I said, "Your Honor, I had Sex before I was married but Sex left me after I was married."
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> >> The Judge said, "Same here!"
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> >> Last night Sex ran off again. I spent hours looking all over for her. A cop came over and asked me what I was doing in the alley at 4 o'clock in the morning.
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> >> I said, "I'm looking for Sex." -- My case comes up next Thursday.
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> >> Well now I've been thrown in jail, been divorced and had more damn troubles with that dog than I ever foresaw.
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> >> Why just the other day when I went for my first session with the psychiatrist, she asked me, "What seems to be the trouble?"
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> >> I replied, "Sex has been my best friend all my life but now it has left me forever. I can't live any longer being so lonely."
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> >> And the doctor said, "Look mister, you should understand that sex isn't a man's best friend so go get yourself a dog."

Thanks Randy