The Eco - Senior

Monday, February 3, 2014

backgrounders for junkies

Not casual reading at all and not for the novice or lightly engaged either.
If it’s too long to get through in one go take two like I did…

http://therealnews.com/t2/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=31&Itemid=74&jumival=11403

Thanks Ed

Obummer! by Christina Houston

"Oh, Donna"

In case you missed it, this will soon be #1!

Listen to a new hit song, sweeping the country.

The 50's hit, will never be the same.

(Make sure sound is ON.

Thanks Kerry

I’d be scared shtless if I found out someone has a life insurance policy on me that I had no idea about – Like a lot of other things happening these days it should be illegal !! - Win

Dead Peasant Policy

http://vimeo.com/85522981

Thanks Win

Doritos Super Bowl 2014 Commercial Doritos Cowboy Kid Best Super Bowl Co...

Wisdom

As I hurtled through space, one thought

kept crossing my mind - every part of

this rocket was supplied by

the lowest bidder.

~ John Glenn

*****

When the white missionaries came

to Africa they had the Bible and we had

the land. They said 'Let us pray.' We

closed our eyes. When we opened

them we had the Bible and they

had the land.

   ~ Desmond Tutu

   *****

   America is the only country where a

significant proportion of the population

believes that professional wrestling

is real but the moon landing

was faked.
   ~ David Letterman

   *****

   I'm not a paranoid, deranged millionaire.

I'm a billionaire!
   ~ Howard Hughes

   *****

   After the game, the King and the pawn

go into the same box.
   ~ Italian proverb

   *****

   Men are like linoleum floors.

Lay 'em right and you can walk

all over them for thirty years.
   ~ Betsy Salkind

   *****

   The only reason they say 'Women

and children first' is to test the strength

of the lifeboats.
   ~ Jean Kerr

   *****

   I've been married to a communist

and a fascist, and neither would take out

the garbage.
   ~ Zsa Zsa Gabor

   *****

   You know you're a redneck if your

home has wheels and your car doesn't.
   ~ Jeff Foxworthy

   *****

   When a man opens a car door

for his wife, it's either a new car or

a new wife.

   ~ Prince Philip

   *****

   A computer once beat me at chess,

but it was no match for me at kickboxing.
   ~ Emo Philips.

   *****

   Wood burns faster when you have

to cut and chop it yourself.
   ~ Harrison Ford

   *****

   The best cure for sea sickness

is to sit under a tree.
   ~ Spike Milligan

   *****

   Lawyers believe a man is innocent

until proven broke.
   ~ Robin Hall

   *****

   Kill one man and you're a murderer,

kill a million and you're a conqueror.
   ~ Jean Rostand.

   *****

   Having more money doesn't make

you happier. I have 50 million dollars

but I'm just as happy as when

I had 48 million.
   ~ Arnold Schwarzenegger.

   *****

   We are here on earth to do good

unto others. What the others are

here for, I have no idea.
   ~ WH Auden

   *****

   In hotel rooms I worry. I can't be

the only guy who sits on the

furniture naked.

   ~ Jonathan Katz

   *****

   If life were fair Elvis would still be

alive today and all the impersonators

would be dead.
   ~ Johnny Carson

   *****

   I don't believe in astrology. I am a Sagittarius and we're very skeptical.
   ~ Arthur C Clarke

   *****

   Hollywood must be the only place

on earth where you can be fired by

a man wearing a Hawaiian shirt

and a baseball cap.
   ~ Steve Martin

   *****

   Home cooking. Where many a man

thinks his wife is.
   ~ Jimmy Durante

   *****

   America is so advanced that even

the chairs are electric.
   ~ Doug Hamwell

   *****

   The first piece of luggage on the

carousel never belongs to anyone.
   ~ George Roberts

   *****

   If God had intended us to fly he

would have made it easier to get

to the airport
   ~ Jonathan Winters

   *****

   I have kleptomania, but when

it gets bad, I take something for it.
~ Robert Benchley

Thanks Randy

How real men decorate.

Thanks Ivan

The New 2014 snow plow.

Thanks Kerry

Check your Driver's License

Check your Driver's License , US and Canada now Included!

Now you can see anyone's Driver's License on the Internet, including your
own! I just searched for mine and there it was...picture and all! Go to the
web site, and check it out. It's unbelievable!!! Just enter your name, city
and province to see if yours is on file.

After your license comes on the screen, click the box marked "Please
Remove." This will remove it from public viewing, but not from law
enforcement. I already removed mine. I suggest you all do the same.

Please notify all your friends so they can protect themselves too.
Believe me they will thank you for it.

http://www.license.shorturl.com/
Thanks Brenda

You looked a lot like my wife

A serious drunk walked into a bar and, after staring for some time at the only woman seated at the bar, walked over to her and kissed her. She jumped up and slapped him silly. He immediately apologized and explained, "I'm sorry. I thought you were my wife. You look exactly like her."

"Why you worthless, insufferable, wretched, no good drunk!" she screamed.

"Funny," he muttered, "you even sound exactly like her."

Thanks Randy

Sunday, February 2, 2014

Sunday's Vehicle - Ferrari California

Old Butch

John was in the fertilized egg business.

He had several hundred young layers (hens), called 'pullets,' and ten roosters to fertilize the eggs.

He kept records, and any rooster not performing went into the soup pot and was replaced.

This took a lot of time, so he bought some tiny bells and attached them to his roosters.

Each bell had a different tone, so he could tell from a distance, which rooster was performing.

Now, he could sit on the porch and fill out an efficiency report by just listening to the bells.

John's favorite rooster, old Butch, was a very fine specimen, but this morning he noticed old Butch's bell hadn't rung at all!

When he went to investigate, he saw the other roosters were busy chasing pullets, bells-a-ringing, but the pullets, hearing the roosters coming, would run for cover.

To John's amazement, old Butch had his bell in his beak, so it couldn't ring.

He'd sneak up on a pullet, do his job and walk on to the next one.

John was so proud of old Butch, he entered him in the Saint Lawrence County Fair and he became an

overnight sensation among the judges.

The result was the judges not only awarded old Butch the "No Bell Piece Prize," but they also awarded him the "Pulletsurprise" as well.

Clearly old Butch was a politician in the making. Who else but a politician could figure out how to win two of the most coveted awards on our planet by being the best at sneaking up on the

unsuspecting populace and screwing them when they weren't paying attention.

Vote carefully in 2015, the bells are not always audible.

Thanks Marc

Canadian built snow blower

Now here is a snow blower that gets the job done. Maybe a touch hard on gas, but sure as hell moves the snow.

Now THIS is a snowblower!!

-- http://www.chonday.com/Videos/snowblowvch1

Thanks Cliff

I know you have been laying awake at night wondering why baby diapers

have brand names such as "Luvs", "Huggies," and "Pampers', while

undergarments for old people are called "Depends".

Well here is the low down on the whole thing.

When babies crap in their pants, people are still gonna Luv'em, Hug'em

and Pamper em.

When old people crap in their pants, it "Depends" on who's in the will!

Glad I got that straightened out so you can rest your mind.